Well, I have been given a totally awesome opportunity over the course of this summer. I was asked to work as an accountability mentor to a super impressive young woman and I have enjoyed it immensely. I gave her a challenge a couple of days ago, to try and find at least ten scriptures related to God's feelings on what it means to be a good friend and/or the importance of friendships. Now, I was thinking about this yesterday as I was journaling and I realized that I really do not want to be or have friends that rely on me right now. I am really in "one of those" moods at this point in my life. So...I got a strong impression that I had better do this assignment myself. So I went on a scripture search. It was an interesting ride. I began with the greatest friendship, perhaps in history, with David and Jonathon. It was "friendship at first sight" and they truly loved each other. Their "souls were knit together" and they made a covenant of friendship between each other that is absolutely beautiful. They were completely engaged in making certain that their friend was given his heart's desire. And it was a true covenant, they invoked the name of the Lord in their promise to each other (...the Lord be between thee and me for ever. 1 Samuel 20:23.) As I was reading about this, a couple of things crossed my mind. First, I wondered if Jonathon had lived if David would have made the same mistakes that he made in his later life. I know that I am making stupid choices right now just because of the loss of close friends. I do think that losing part of his soul, as David did, was a strong enough loss that it could have led to some loss of common sense. The other question that crossed my mind was whether or not such friendships are possible today. I do not know that such a friendship is any longer a possibility. I do not know if you could find two people who would be that selfless and humble and connected with God. And a friendship such as this requires stillness and quiet, something that we have very little of in today's world.
I found a number of very beautiful scriptures relating to friends and friendship. Beginning in Job, where in the closing words of this story, we are reminded that "The Lord turned the captivity of Job, when he prayed for his friends...Job 42:10). Whoa, that gives a lot of power to friendship. And yes, there have been a number of times when I have been led out of captivity by a friend. In Proverbs we are told that a friend "loveth at all times" (17:17) and can "sticketh closer than a brother" (18:24) and that a friend "sharpeneth our countenance" (27:17). Again, I see power in friendship.
In looking at Christ's own words, I found it interesting that in Matthew 20:13 he refers to a murmurer as a friend and as the soldiers are taking Christ away, after the kiss of Judas, Jesus calls Judas, Friend. Given the power that is inherent, throughout the scriptures, in this word, that is pretty amazing. I loved reading in Luke 11, the verses that lead up to the "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened up to you." In the verses (5-8) that lead up to this promise, Christ refers to the relationship of a good friend. I was especially touched by this passage because in another, recent, blog post, the idea of a "2 AM friend" was introduced by a comment from Brian and I received a number of sweet messages from good people telling me that they would indeed be a 2 AM friend, should I ever need one. And in these scriptures in Luke, this is what the Savior is talking about, about the importance of having a friend who will give you bread when you beg at midnight. And then He goes on to offer to be just that kind of friend. I am grateful to have some people in my life who have offered to be that kind of friend, and I am especially grateful to have Him as a friend to me. I hope that someday I have the desire to be that kind of friend again. In John 3:29, He invites us to be His friend and to therefore know joy and rejoicing. And of course, there is that beautiful verse, John 15:13, "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends."
Hmmmm...I would so like to be called, as Abraham was "the Friend of God" (James 2:23). But I think in order to be called that, one must be a friend to those that God puts in our path. And right now, I am not in a place to be that kind of person. I am not willing, right now, to open myself up to trusting in this kind of fashion. But I did learn how to be a friend, from this scripture journey. So, if the day comes when I find the faith and strength to lose my pride, I will have a better idea of what I need to do.
You are too hard on yourself, Cynthia. You are a wonderful friend! And those are beautiful thoughts about friendship.
ReplyDeleteShe always is, Melinda. But so are you and I, right? Still, I think that friends like this are possible today. Joseph and Porter were friends like that. Parley was a friend like that. And I can't personally find much sympathy for David for making wrong choices because he lost Jonathan to death. Jeremiah had absolutely no friends and stayed faithful. It's easier to have friends who lead you right, but it's no excuse for misbehavior if they all turn away or die.
ReplyDelete"Would you jump off a cliff, too, if everyone else did it?!"
>> I would so like to be called, as Abraham was "the Friend of God"
ReplyDeleteYou can...but maybe not in the way you think. =)
When ancient Jews entered into a covenant with each other, they would offer each other whatever they needed. They would exchange cloaks, exchange wallets, and even combine their names. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, for example, might change their names to Bradeline and Angebrad.
That's why Abram became Abraham and Sarai became Sarah...they added "AH" to each, and the AH part came from Yahweh.
When someone was in covenant with another, they became connected to them in special ways. Each enjoyed their shared names, shared resources, and shared protection. If you messed with Brad, you messed with Angelina. Each became known as the other's "friend".
When God entered into covenant with Abram, things weren't done in the typical covenant way. Normally, each party would perform certain rituals, with both doing the same thing. When God made His covenant with Abram, He put Abram to sleep and did it all by Himself. Why?
Simple: nobody can keep a covenant with God. We are, on our own, unfaithful. We can't offer Him our resources or our protection, as He needs neither. We can only accept His gracious offer to us. We can enter into a covenant with each other, but a covenant with God is one-sided.
That's one of the major differences between traditional Mormonism and traditional Christianity, by the way. Traditional Christianity says "no amount of effort on our part is sufficient" to maintain covenant with God...so His grace is needed from beginning to end. Mormonism, on the other hand, says that God's grace is applied only "after all you can do".
If you want to be "a friend of God", you can only do it on His terms. You, like Abram, can't take part. You can only accept His grace, given to you without condition. There's no "all you can do" involved...there's NOTHING we can do to enter into, and to keep, a covenant with God.
As 1 Corinthians 6:1 says, I urge you "not to receive the grace of God in vain". Don't be fooled: you can only be a "friend of God" by recognizing that you have no part in the WORK of salvation, but only in the ACCEPTANCE of it.
Have a great day, Cynthia!
Tony absolutely NAILED it on this one. Those last three paragraphs are SPOT ON. They bear repeating here.
ReplyDelete"That's one of the major differences between traditional Mormonism and traditional Christianity, by the way. Traditional Christianity says "no amount of effort on our part is sufficient" to maintain covenant with God...so His grace is needed from beginning to end. Mormonism, on the other hand, says that God's grace is applied only "after all you can do"."
"If you want to be "a friend of God", you can only do it on His terms. You, like Abram, can't take part. You can only accept His grace, given to you without condition. There's no "all you can do" involved...there's NOTHING we can do to enter into, and to keep, a covenant with God."
"As 1 Corinthians 6:1 says, I urge you "not to receive the grace of God in vain". Don't be fooled: you can only be a "friend of God" by recognizing that you have no part in the WORK of salvation, but only in the ACCEPTANCE of it."
Right on, Tony.
To propose otherwise is to put us on an equal footing with God. We are NOT, and NEVER will be God. First lie of the serpent to Eve in the garden: You will be like God. That's evil. Our righteousness, as compared to His, is like filthy rags.
There is only one "person" in the Bible who is repeatedly referred to as someone who is JEALOUS of God, and in fact, wants to BE God. And that is Satan. Why, to this day, can some not see that ANY religion that suggests that we can become God is from this same source? Brilliantly disguised though it is. That is the ultimate in arrogance. Hell, it's Satanic arrogance.
Why would anyone want to be God? I've seen His job, and I don't want it.
What were we talking about? Oh yeah, friends. Which I hope we still are, Cynthia.
Why did two of Cynthia's friends take one thought out of a lenghthy blog filled with heartfelt confessions and use that thought as an opportunity to attack her religion? That's not very friendly.
ReplyDeleteI am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and proud of it! I could respond to your comments about covenants by appealing to the Bible, but our interpretations would continue to differ. I am very grateful for modern day scriptures and prophets that help clarify the Bible. Yes, the Bible has many mistakes and ommissions, as a lot of linguistic Bible scholars would tell you. I am very grateful for the Bible, especially the details about the Savior's life. I know through the power of the Holy Spirit that the Book of Mormon, Another Testament of Jesus Christ, is the word of God. I know that Thomas Monson is a prophet of God leading Christ's church. You can think all you want that I am deluded or deceived, but you are wrong. You do not know my mind and heart; please do not judge me.
By the way, Cynthia does not know I am writing this, so if I have upset you, please do not take it out on her.
Melinda:
ReplyDeleteI'm afraid that you've seriously misjudged me. That makes me feel bad for you. You see, Cynthia and I *are* friends, which is why we CAN talk about our differences. I don't know about you, but I relish the opportunity to learn about another's beliefs. I appreciate it when someone cares enough about me to disagree, and I absolutely love it when I learn something new.
Cynthia expressed a heartfelt desire to be called "a friend of God". She apparently didn't know that her desire can be fulfilled at any time, so I explained the meaning of the phrase. I also explained that being a friend of God, as Abraham was, doesn't match up with current LDS doctrine. If you have a better explanation of what we read in Scripture, I'd love to read it. Neither Cynthia nor I are intimidated by disagreement, so we are able to take part in such meaningful discussions.
My sincere prayer is that you too will be unafraid of those who differ. It's a great blessing to have affection for those outside of my own religious community, and to know that an honest discussion is no threat to real friendship. In our short and busy lives, we too often fail to cultivate such relationships...and while I appreciate you sticking up for your friend, I'm sorry that you can't imagine that I was doing the same. Friends don't ignore their differences for the sake of comfort. True friendship - the kind that Cynthia wrote about - can ONLY thrive where there is also true honesty.
Thank you for sharing your testimony with me, by the way. It's a start. Maybe you and I can be friends as well someday.
Thank you, Tony. I did misread your comment because I thought you were saying that we can not be friends with God. I apoplogize. By the time I was finished reading all of the comments, I was very put off by Andrew's statement that my beliefs are inspired by Satan. That kind of accusation does not encourage open discussion. I would be interested in a respectful disscussion on covenants with you, though. Thanks again.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate your response, Melinda...thank you very much.
ReplyDeleteIn Andy's defense, you and he aren't so different. Neither am I. Let me explain:
I'm a Christian in the traditional sense. You're a Mormon. We can't both be right. That's plain and simple, for anyone who understands both Christianity and Mormonism, to see. Why? Because they're not the same.
From a Christian point of view, you're in a cult. You believe things that are contrary to what we find in the Bible. That puts you fundamentally at odds with who I believe God is and what He wants.
From a Mormon point of view, I'm a Gentile. I believe things that are contrary to what the LDS church teaches. That puts me fundamentally at odds with who you believe God is and what He wants.
From both your perspective and mine, the other person believes a lie from Satan. I believe that Satan has perverted the truth by getting people like you to believe a lie. You believe that Satan has perverted the truth by getting people like me to believe a lie.
While these ideas aren't often expressed out loud, they're accurate. It shouldn't stop us from being friends, however. Recognizing where we differ is simply being honest...it's not necessarily being hurtful.
If you want to criticize Andy for his comment about the LDS church being based on Satan's deception, you should also be willing to criticize the Mormon church for putting the exact same thing in their temple ceremony. I was, at one time, paid clergy. I could take offense at the LDS notion that I am an agent of Satan, just as you've taken offense at Andy's characterization of Mormon doctrine.
Where would that get us? Nowhere. It's much better to be friends, exchange ideas, challenge one another to examine our beliefs, and to be gracious throughout. That's what I'm trying to do here. I'm Cynthia's friend...so I care about what happens to her. That means that I'm willing to risk being misunderstood for the sake of being honest. I'm doing the same with you. It's not popular to point out that most LDS mirror Andy's point of view, but it's TRUE nonetheless. Not talking about it would diminish us all. Certainly many of Mormonism's detractors act hatefully and are only trying to hurt...but the fact that Andy and I are STILL Cynthia's friends, after such openness and honesty, shows that we're not in that category.
I appreciate the opportunity to talk with you about this, Melinda. I don't dislike you...I only dislike when good people are led astray. If you feel that I've been led astray, you'd be doing me a kindness to acknowledge it, express it, explain it, and defend it. Were you to show me the errors of my way, I'd owe you an eternal debt of gratitude. Does that make sense?
Have a great day! =)
Well...I've read through these comments a few times. Thought provoking stuff. Covenants specifically. I love talking about covenants, because I believe it is at the core of how God deals with His children, has since the beginning of time. The word covenant by nature connotates an agreement. It is much more than just promises given from one side. Why would God use the word "covenant" if He meant "promises"? And when He set up that covenant with Abraham, and established His covenant people, He gave them things to do as signs of that covenant...the Sabbath as one example. When Israel kept in the covenant they prospered, when they strayed from the covenant they floundered. So, as I see it, there is power in keeping covenants. It is how I can draw on God and His infinite power. Does it mean that I am earning my way? Absolutely not!!! Cynthia can attest that I do not believe there is anything we ever earn or deserve in relationship to blessings from the Lord. In His love and compassion and generosity He gives of His grace. However He does ask things from us, and to access that grace and power, we submit to Him.
ReplyDeleteActually, I really only wanted to say.... powerful, soul-binding friendships DO exist today!!! I can attest to many of them. And Cynthia, thank you for offering that to me!
Darleen:
ReplyDeleteIt's nice to meet you, as well. =)
You're exactly right when you say that God gave Abraham and his descendants things to do as signs of His covenant with them. That's what a large portion of the Old Testament is about.
Covenants were ALWAYS made between two parties, and they performed the exact same ceremonies. This put them on equal footing, regardless of their prior social standing or their available resources. We would say that THEY made a covenant...because it required both parties to complete the formal ceremony.
When we understand that God made a covenant with Abram, and that they did NOT make a covenant together, much of the rest of the Bible makes more sense.
For example: different religious traditions disagree on the place of "works" in relationship to God. Traditional Christianity, as mentioned above, makes the claim that no amount of good works on our part will gain us salvation, or entrance to Heaven. Many other religious movements outside of Christianity claim that works are an integral part of our salvation.
Understanding God's covenant with Abram is essential to understanding the rest of God's plan. Abram was given things to do, for sure...but the covenant was completed without his participation. He was the RECIPIENT of God's gracious promises, not a PARTICIPANT in a covenant between equals.
Have a great day!