So, in my studies this morning, I found the following quote by C.S. Lewis...
"The moment when one first says, really meaning it, that though he is not 'my sort of man' he is a very good man 'in his own way' is one of liberation. It does not feel like that; we may feel only tolerant and indulgent. But really we have crossed a frontier. That 'in his own way' statment means that we are getting beyond our own idiosyncrasies, that we are learning to appreciate goodness or intelligence in themselves, not merely goodness or intelligence flavoured and served to suit our own palate. 'Dogs and cats should always be brought up together,' said someone, 'it broadens their minds so,' Affection broadens ours." (This is from The Four Loves, for those who care to know a reference.)
Lewis uses this word "affection" a great deal in a number of passages in this and other works. As I have been reading these passages this morning, and in particular the quote that I just offered, I am on fire! This is what I hunger for and what I hope that I emulate in my life. This is what I feel that I have begun to discover in the past few years of my life and it is indeed LIBERATING! I love Lewis' use of that word "liberation". In so many ways, that is what I have found and I am so grateful for it. I yearn for others that I love to find similar freedom and peace. I cannot begin to describe the color that has been added to my life because I felt the liberation and allowance to explore beyond the limits of my own idiosyncrasies. In opening myself up to learning to appreciate all of the goodness and intelligence in other cultures and beliefs, I have truly expanded my own palate and come to realize that I can find truth and peace in all tenets, creeds and doctrines. I can truly say that I am coming to see that I can appreciate anybody on their own 'goodness and intelligence' without such a need for them to be like me.
This "affection" as Lewis terms it, is what I think the world truly needs more of, it always has, but especially now. We claim to be at a time of enlightenment and tolerance, but from where I sit, it seems exactly the opposite. And I also think I know how we can find it, at least I know how I have found it. I have found it through stillness. I was forced to it through tragedy that threatened to overwhelm me, but I am grateful for everything that I have experienced in the past 6 years because I was indeed forced to go still in order to survive and I was also forced to look beyond what I had been told all my life and truly search for myself and that has made all the difference. It has not made my life easy, and I continue to question, which is uncomfortable, but it has made it rich and beautiful and absolutely filled with incredible people of every walk of life. I am indeed an awfully lucky being.
I, too, have found great blessings from returning again and again to stillness, as well as not taking for granted the "knowledge" that was imparted to me growing up. I don't think I have broadened my sphere as much as you, but I frequently tell myself that there is more than one right way to do a lot of things in life. It is a difficult thing that you ask of the world, but I believe it is worth the effort.
ReplyDeleteI truly believe that many would benefit from this change in affection. I see it in my nursing, everyday life, and especially with the work I do with my adopted children with disabilities. So many people say how wonderful I must be for taking them in and changing my life to help them but; if we are to look at it through the affection paradigm there would never be achild not taken care of that was in need. If there was a need in others lives that we are associated with we would fill it reaching across the religious, political, and racial lines without hesitation. I am not extaordinary, I am just determined to keep my word to my HF and do the best I can to be a good woman. };)
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